Breaking Silence on Child Advocacy and Healing Trauma
with Dr. Pamela J. Pine
Are you ready to confront the uncomfortable and make a real difference? Join us in this powerful episode with Dr. Pamela J. Pine, an expert in preventing and mitigating child sexual abuse and adverse childhood experiences. Dr. Pine shares her journey of advocacy and the transformative work she’s doing through her role at Stop the Silence. This episode delves into the importance of addressing trauma, especially in children, and provides a compelling call to action for anyone moved to support or engage in this crucial work.
Key Takeaways:
Impact of Childhood Trauma: Explore the profound effects of adverse childhood experiences on individuals and communities, and why addressing these issues is vital.
Empowering Advocacy: Learn about the strategies and approaches Dr. Pine uses to advocate for children and educate the public about the importance of trauma prevention.
Getting Involved: Discover practical ways you can contribute to this cause, whether through learning, supporting, or direct action.
Why Listen: If you feel a pull to contribute to societal healing or if you're just curious about the role you can play in alleviating the trauma of others, this episode will equip you with the knowledge and inspiration needed to make a difference. Tune in to learn how you can help change narratives and support healing in your community and beyond.
About Dr. Pamela J. Pine
Pamela J. Pine, PhD, MPH has been an international health, development, and communication professional throughout her adult life, supporting the lives of poor and otherwise underserved groups, with a two-decade specialty on preventing and mitigating child sexual abuse (CSA) and other adverse childhood experiences (ACEs). She is also a professor, best-selling author, and a multimedia artist.
Connect with Dr. Pamela J. Pine
Website: https://www.ivatcenters.org/stop-the-silence
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drpamelajpine2/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/pamela-j-pine-3123b78/
About Aleya Harris
Aleya Harris is the spark for your spark™. A trailblazer in purpose-driven story crafting, she is a marketing executive and ex-Google Vendor Partner who brings her dynamic experience to her role as the CEO of The Evolution Collective Inc. Aleya is an international award-winning speaker, the founder and lead trainer of Spark the Stage ™, and the host of the award-winning Flourishing Entrepreneur Podcast. She is also the author of the bestselling book Spark the Stage: Master the Art of Professional Speaking and Authentic Storytelling to Captivate, Inspire, and Transform Your Audience. Her unique approach as a Strategic Storytelling Consultant has revolutionized the way businesses communicate, transforming workplace cultures and market positioning. With her dynamic energy and proven methodologies, Aleya guides clients to unlock their potential, articulate their radically authentic stories, and achieve unparalleled success.
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Register at https://www.aleyaharris.com/masterclass
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Work with Aleya to Craft a Better Story
If you can't communicate who you are, your company will make less money. An unclear strategy, confusing brand, or undefined workplace culture will repel ideal clients, visibility opportunities, and career-making connections. Work with Aleya Harris, a strategic storytelling consultant and seasoned marketer, to develop an authentic story that differentiates you from the competition and builds stronger relationships with your target audience.
Schedule a call at https://www.evolutioncollective.com/
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Connect with Aleya Harris
Speaking & Media: https://www.aleyaharris.com
The Evolution Collective Inc.: https://www.evolutioncollective.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/aleyaharris/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/aleyaharris/
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Links Mentioned on this Podcast
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[00:01] Aleya Harris: You know, those topics that you're not supposed to talk about, like in polite company, quote unquote, sex, politics, religion, those types of things, money. Even though that last one is held up by the patriarchy.
[00:19] But we're going to let that go for right now.
[00:22] Another thing that we don't like to talk about is trauma, especially trauma to vulnerable populations like children and what that trauma does and how and what our role could be in alleviating the pain of others.
[00:37] In polite conversation, we often stick to the weather and happy things and reality TV shows and what could pass as pleasing but doesn't have the impact.
[00:51] And today we're going to change that a little bit. Today we're going to have an impact. Full conversation with Dr. Pamela J. Pine. Dr. Pamela J. Pine, Ph.D. and Masters in Public Health, has been an international health development and communication professional throughout her adult life, supporting the lives of poor and otherwise underserved groups with a two decade specialty on preventing and mitigating child sexual abuse, CSA and other adverse childhood experiences.
[01:21] ACEs. She is also a professor, bestselling author and a multimedia artist. And today we're going to talk a little bit about the stories that we tell ourselves to not get involved in the trauma of others, especially of children and other wise, more sensitive populations.
[01:39] And we're going to talk about how to change that story using Pamela's example. Pamela is not a victim of child sexual abuse, but she heard the stories in her work and she got involved.
[01:52] So if you have a nagging within you to be more involved in someone else's story and you just aren't sure how or what or who and how to bust through those limiting beliefs that are holding you back, then, my friend, this episode is for you.
[02:06] All right, let's go.
[02:10] Yuliya Patsay: Welcome to the Flourishing Entrepreneur podcast with Aleyah Harris.
[02:16] If you're looking for actionable ways to overcome communication and differentiation challenges by sharing radically authentic stories, you are in the right place.
[02:27] Listen in and learn how to stand in the power of your unique narrative to transform your personal life, business and workplace culture. And now, your host, award winning international speaker, strategic storytelling consultant and Japanese whiskey lover, Ruby Coral's mom, Aleyah Harris.
[03:00] Aleya Harris: Hi Pamela. Thank you so much for joining us here on the Flourishing Entrepreneur podcast. How are you doing today?
[03:05] Dr. Pamela J. Pine: I'm good, I'm good. Getting better all the time.
[03:09] Aleya Harris: I love that. I love to hear that. Before we dive into some of our questions, can you tell the people who you are and what you do?
[03:17] Dr. Pamela J. Pine: Sure. My professional name is Dr. Pamela J. Pine. There's actually another Dr. Pamela Pine in California. So I use my initial. And I am the director of Stop the Silence, a department of the Institute on Violence, Abuse and Trauma.
[03:41] And I work on the prevention and mitigation of adverse childhood experiences, or ACEs, including child sexual abuse, child physical abuse, emotional abuse, neglect, and a number of other adverse childhood experiences.
[04:02] Aleya Harris: Wow. What meaningful and important work. How did you get into that work?
[04:08] Dr. Pamela J. Pine: Yeah, well, I'm by background and training. I'm an international public health development and communication specialist.
[04:18] And 25 years ago now, I was sitting at the agency where I was working in Washington, D.C. and across my screen came some information from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
[04:36] And I looked at it, and it was a call, very, very early call 25 years ago. Very, very early call for robust research in interpersonal violence. And it had bullying as a focus and child abuse and elder abuse and domestic violence.
[04:59] My sister had been a therapist in California and had gotten a name for herself of being able to work successfully with survivors of child sexual abuse. So I began there, and I'll tell you, I started reading and I couldn't stop.
[05:19] And I've never stopped for 25 years because the numbers that child sexual abuse are represented in, in terms of girls and boys in the United States alone, one out of four girls, one out of six boys, and the impact on their lives.
[05:37] But then as they became adolescents and they became adults and their families are affected and their communities are affected, it was overwhelming. And I had had a lot of education up to that point and most of it in public health without one course in childhood trauma.
[05:58] So I felt something needed to be done and, well, it might as well be me. So I started an organization. Stop the Silence was a freestanding organization for 20 years before we joined the Institute on Violence, Abuse and Trauma, or ivat.
[06:19] And we worked on advocacy, education and training and policy development and reform. And then everything was transferred over to ivat, and I became the Stop the Silence director there. So that's.
[06:32] That's the short version. Even though it's probably too long.
[06:36] I was. I was. I was impassioned. The way I explain it is, is that the issue took me rather than me taking it.
[06:44] Aleya Harris: I can see that. And I also want to give you huge credit because a lot of people will see something's wrong and then say, oh, I sure hope somebody fixes that.
[06:53] And you said, I'm going to go and be part of the solution, which is huge. And that really boils down to the stories we tell ourselves about what we are capable of and what we can do in.
[07:07] In the world? I mean, how do you feel that the stories that we tell ourselves impact our trajectory in life? And how have the stories you've told impacted the trajectory of your life?
[07:19] Dr. Pamela J. Pine: Yeah, that's a. It's a fascinating question.
[07:23] I think that the trajectories of my life and the stories that I tell myself are ourselves. And stories that we tell ourselves are critical.
[07:37] I was really supported as a kid. I mean, I was one of the lucky kids. My family was far from perfect. Well, they weren't perfect. They were pretty darn good, but they weren't perfect.
[07:47] But I had.
[07:50] I had parents and a situation and a community that supported me in pretty much everything that I took up to do, whether it was science or art or music or whatever it was.
[08:07] So I was able to move forward in a positive manner. Not that my life has always been easy, not that I haven't had my struggles, but it has moved forward overall in a positive fashion, and I was able to learn from the struggles.
[08:30] The stories that we tell ourselves, just to touch on that for a moment, are absolutely critical. They're almost everything besides what we're given physically. You know, food and water and housing and all that kind of stuff.
[08:45] But what do we tell ourselves about ourselves? Am I a good person? Am I a moral person? Am I ethical? Do I do things well? Am I smart? Am I capable?
[08:54] Am I skilled? All of those things are so important to how we think about ourselves. And all those things I was told I was. I was okay in when I was a kid.
[09:08] And that's the start of it all. That childhood stuff is the start of it all, I think.
[09:14] Aleya Harris: And you're helping children have better, less traumatic stories so that the start of it all doesn't end up informing or changing the trajectory of their lives, which I think is incredibly powerful.
[09:29] But I want to know, as you've been telling this empowering story to yourself, obviously, because you are in motion, actively doing good work in the world, there have to have been times where you succeeded.
[09:47] And you. And you labeled something as a success, and you labeled something as a failure. All of those are still part of the story we're telling ourselves because we have different measures of success and failure.
[09:57] But how do you use those concepts within your own story? And can you give us an example of what that looks like?
[10:06] Dr. Pamela J. Pine: I can.
[10:08] There. There are. I've been relatively, I think, I believe I feel about myself. I've been relatively and often extraordinarily successful, and I'm really happy and I'm proud of that. And it's carried me forward.
[10:26] And as important, I think it's allowed me to do good work in the world and affect other people's lives.
[10:35] But certainly failure is a part of all of our lives. And two things come to mind.
[10:44] One is a time when I was working in Morocco. I'm an international public health specialist and I've worked all over the place. And I was living and working in Morocco, and there was this wonderful project that we, it was a team of two, me and another American working with Moroccan women.
[11:03] We had developed this micro enterprise program and allowed women who were a part of the program to supplement their family's income. They had never worked before, most of them had not been to school.
[11:21] And we developed both a beautiful, I mean gorgeous, doll making business that ultimately were exported to the United nations and an apiculture beekeeping business. Now, these are women who had never been out of their communities.
[11:37] And we were trekking them, you know, like 20 miles so that they could work with their hives and the bees, they made their own costumes and it was fantastic.
[11:47] But the US government decided not to continue to fund it.
[11:55] And I was really distraught because it did so much good for these 50 women. And I saw it as possibility, possibly going all over Morocco. So it didn't feel good.
[12:09] But I learned how to take that in stride and move it forward and learned lessons about what I needed to do for a next project to make sure that the core and the base is there.
[12:23] But another example is a really personal one, and that is, is that there are people who have been in my life, and I always thought, and I was taught actually, that it was really up to me to make sure that the relationship flourished.
[12:46] And if anything went wrong, somehow, somewhere, it was not. It was both partly my fault, but also my responsibility to fix.
[12:59] That has very recently changed, really recently.
[13:06] And it is a freeing idea. It's not all up to me. I can try my best, but I can also let go.
[13:18] And that's an important lesson as well.
[13:21] Aleya Harris: Wow. I can try my best, but I can also let go. That's. I, I repeated it because a lot of the times people hold on to their failures and they allow them to beat them up.
[13:35] And, and without saying, I try my best, I'm going to let it go. It's, it's.
[13:40] There's this parable where basically I'm going to shorten it. In good times and in bad times, the best thing to say is, this too shall pass, because the good passes and the bad passes, but you just need to keep going, and you'll get more of the good, and you'll get more of the bad, but it's the experience of moving through all of it and what you gain from that experience that really matters.
[14:03] So I love that what you said, do your best and then let it go and let it go. Not take responsibility for things that are not your responsibility.
[14:12] When you do that, it sounds like you've had to overcome a lot of limiting beliefs to make that happen. What were or slash are your limiting beliefs, and can you tell us a story of how they have held or currently hold you back and the tools you use to overcome them?
[14:32] Dr. Pamela J. Pine: Yeah, the limiting one. Limiting and limiting and very profound and important limit. Limiting belief to me, has to do with what we just spoke about, and that is that it's my responsibility.
[14:48] I mean, I was taught that I was. I was taught that that it is up to me to make sure that everybody is okay, that everything is working as it should, that if somebody gets upset, somehow it's my fault on some level.
[15:06] And responsibility, that was truly limiting because you can't let go then. And you're sitting in.
[15:19] You're still sitting in the muck, and you can't get out of the muck unless you're able to understand how to walk and walk from it. And this is really recent.
[15:33] Honestly, Aaliyah, this is really recent for me.
[15:38] And.
[15:40] And what helped me, it wasn't a person. It was time, as you just said, it was father or mother time.
[15:49] Call it. Call it what you will, but it was the process of letting myself both heal and understand and move forward.
[16:05] They're complicated. They're complicated concepts, but that's. I guess the.
[16:11] I guess that's what I want to say right now. Yeah.
[16:15] Aleya Harris: Yeah, that's. That's good.
[16:17] I don't require any more. You've said quite a lot of good things. I think that people can relate to, and I think that, you know, that's why I asked the question in the way that I did about what limiting beliefs did you or are you currently holding?
[16:32] Because sometimes they go away completely and something. They go away a little bit, then they come back, then they leave, then they come back, and then story continues. So I think that whatever you have to say about it at this moment is a good thing to say about it at this moment.
[16:45] But I have complete faith that as you're saying the recent things and the recent changes will change your perspective, will change how you approach your life. And as you keep going, you will see yourself and see life in a Different way.
[17:01] And so when you're gone, imagining that you stay on this same trajectory of development and you continue to refine the story you tell you to yourself and others, what story do you want people to tell about you when you are gone?
[17:18] Dr. Pamela J. Pine: I used to joke with friends actually and say on my headstone, I wanted to say she tried really, really hard.
[17:31] And I guess that is what I want people to know. I mean, I want, I would like people to believe that I was honest, sincere, true, solid, and worked my butt off for the right things and accomplished making the world at least a little bit better, both for others as well as myself.
[18:02] The other thing that I'd like people to think about me, remember about me, is I looked for the beauty and sometimes found it.
[18:16] Aleya Harris: That's beautiful. That is. That is beautiful. I love. You have so many good one liners, Pamela.
[18:25] You're good at this. You are good at this.
[18:29] So if you right now could ask the universe for something and be 100% sure that it would manifest, what would it be and why?
[18:41] Dr. Pamela J. Pine: It would be to make the work that I've worked very hard to accomplish and bring to fruition for a very long time.
[18:56] Take huge wings we're currently working on and have been. But we have some new things coming that, that are, that are in process.
[19:08] We have been working for a very long time on trying to spread the word about child sexual abuse and other adverse childhood experiences.
[19:20] And it's not an easy sell, so to speak. It's really not. I mean, 25 years ago I used to joke that I could clear a cocktail party in five minutes.
[19:32] Ask me what I did, right? Ask me what I did and everybody would walk away from me.
[19:36] That's changed.
[19:41] Our advocacy, education and training programs are geared to reach a large section of many populations.
[19:55] Just like with breast cancer and just like with hivaids, if we don't take a hold of these issues and make a concerted effort to understand them and personally and communally act, it ain't going to get better.
[20:19] Aleya Harris: So if someone is listening to you and they're feeling some of that Dr. Pamela J. Pine energy and they're like, I am not just going to sit here and listen to the problem.
[20:29] I want to be part of the solution. How can they get involved?
[20:33] Dr. Pamela J. Pine: Absolutely, all kinds of ways. I mean, they can learn more about it personally and I'll be happy to talk to anybody.
[20:42] Please feel free to reach out. Pamela p p@ivat centers.org
[20:49] they can look at our website, which is ienters.org
[20:56] stop-the-silence.
[20:59] They can learn about these issues by signing up, registering for the online education program that we have. And they can reach out to me to find out more about that.
[21:14] It's also on our website.
[21:16] And they can also, when they learn more, they can involve their families and communities in education and training. So that this is not a one woman or one man or group process, but it is a recognized focus for their community and frankly, the world.
[21:40] So that's what we're after. It's a beautiful.
[21:42] Aleya Harris: I love it. Yes.
[21:45] Let's let the passion continue for such a wonderful and worthy cause. I appreciate the work that you are doing. I am still at the cocktail party with you. You haven't cleared me out.
[21:59] And supporting. If you had to leave our dear listeners with any last thoughts or final words, what would they be?
[22:10] Dr. Pamela J. Pine: That you can, you can make a difference.
[22:16] And no matter how small you get involved or how big, the difference that you can make, even in one life of whether it's a child or a healing adult, is enormous.
[22:37] Maybe if you engage on learning more, you'll be able to do that really, really well. It's not hard. It's not rocket science.
[22:49] It just takes a little bit of time and a little bit of commitment.
[22:55] Aleya Harris: Beautiful. Well, thank you so much, Dr. Pamela J. Pine, for joining us. I have loved listening to you, learning from you and kind of just getting some of your passion through osmosis.
[23:09] We need more people like you in the world who see something and do something about it. So thank you for your work. I appreciate you and I appreciate you sharing your time with us today.
[23:18] Dr. Pamela J. Pine: I. And I appreciate you. And as I told you even before we got on here, your questions are lovely and brilliant and really soul focused. And I, and I appreciate that.
[23:29] It made me, it made me dive a little bit. And I, I was ha. I was, I was appreciative of that. I really was. Yeah.
[23:39] Aleya Harris: Thank you for sharing that. And my work here is now done. I have gotten someone to dive into themselves today.
[23:46] Dr. Pamela J. Pine: At least one person.
[23:49] Aleya Harris: Well, thank you so much, Pamela. It was a pleasure.
[23:53] Dr. Pamela J. Pine: Thank you very much. You take good care. Have a nice day.
[23:59] Aleya Harris: So I have a challenge for you.
[24:01] Now that you've heard from Dr. Pamela J. Pine and you've seen how the span of her career has been dedicated to helping a cause that she felt struck her in her core.
[24:13] What are you going to do? What cause, what population, what group, what support can you provide? They say if you see something, say something. But I challenge you. If you see something, do something.
[24:28] What story do you need to tell yourself. What story do you need to change to move yourself into action so you're not just a passive viewer of someone else's story of crisis, trauma and pain, but you become their guide, their help to help them change their story and achieve their own success.
[24:49] Just like every week here on the Flourishing Entrepreneur Podcast. My name is Aleyah Harris and I'm sending you lots of love, light and abundance. Bye for now.
[25:00] Yuliya Patsay: Thank you for listening to this episode of the Flourishing Entrepreneur Podcast with Aleyah Harris. Vibing with what you hear. Leave a five star review to spread the love and be sure to click subscribe.
[25:12] We wish you love, light and abundance. See you next time.
